Gchatatat

Justin's Suit  Justin: My starbucks is cooler than your starbucks.

4:18 PMAn old, probably near homeless black guy who's here everyday just stood up and started singing "Let's Get It On"

 me: HAHAHAHA!!!

  Well i have hot chicks with big boobs.

 Justin: Hahaha. He just said "I just want you to know, every now and again I get a little crazy"

 me: Definitely a close race.

 Justin: Damn

 

4:19 PM

  Oh man, gotta tell you this too.

  Went earlier to return that silvery sparkly sports coat...

  The one that I definitely *haven't worn.

 me: lol.

4:20 PM Hard to tell which sparkle is from the natural shine of the coat and which is from the stripper glitter.

 Justin: Well apparently I only checked one of the inside pockets, and the manager that had to approve the return found a condom and stolen mint from Aurora

4:21 PM me: LOLOLOLOLOLOLOL

 Justin: Oh man, I played it so cool.

  I felt like the guy in the "It Wasn't Me" song.

  Didn't even acknowledge it.

  "No, I never wore it"  ~~~Isaac's MySpace 

2:06 PM me: Myspace sold for $35 million. Reeeeeeeal smart business deal.

 Isaac: Interesting... Who bought it?

2:07 PM me: I dunno. Biggest dumbass chump in the world?

  I think Tom from Myspace was just hoping to get enough to finally afford that used motorcycle he's had his eye on lately.

 Isaac: haha

2:08 PM Wouldn't surprise me if Facebook bought it.

  Or Google.

 me: Actually, I think yahoo bought it.

  I heard they were trying toso I'm assuming it was them.

 Isaac: Google is coming out with a social platform

  Google+

 me: Haha, well I gotta go. Add me on google+

  I have 0 friends!

2:11 PM Isaac: Facebook's traffic dropped significantly last month.

 me: Hahahahah

  I'm doing my best to keep it up.

  Trust me.

 Isaac: SSTS doesn't help?

2:12 PM me: They need new customers. They need to start marketing to newborn babies. Their parents always post their pics. Now they need their own accounts.

 Isaac: Hahaha

 me: This is all blog GOLD, btw!

 Isaac: Better yet, just make a contract with the government - you get a birth certificate and a Facebook account outta the belly

 me: Saving this convo for sure.

 
~~~ Stephanie's 'Roids 

11:42 AM me: Hahahah... This little kid was pissed off at his mom, and he's all decked out in 'underarmor' workout clothes... And he just roundhouse kicked the cream and sugar station!

 Stephanie: HAHAHAH

  How little?

11:43 AM Awesome tiny roid-fueled douchebag!me: Like 8 years old.

  Totally juiced...

  on juice-boxes...

  and roids, probably.

 Stephanie: Is his shirt sleeveless? Please say his shirt is sleeveless!

11:50 AM me: Not really, short though...and tight.

  And black.

 The shirt, not the kid.

11:51 AM Stephanie: I was about to say... Now THAT'S a detail revealing a little roid-fueled rascism.

  Juice head.

11:52 AM me: His mom yelled at him and told him to sit down. He totally pushed the chair away across the floor.

11:53 AM She's gonna get beat when they get home

11:54 AM Stephanie: I'm also picturing a red head.

11:55 AM me: OMG! I wish!

  Blonde, but buzzed hair.

11:59 AM Stephanie: asshole

12:00 PM Actual headline on cnn.com: "Tiger Grows Beard"

12:01 PM me: Old news.

 Stephanie: I assume Tiger Woods.

 me: Yeah.

  Seriously. Would be more interested in the story if it were an actual tiger with a beard.

 Stephanie: And if that guy is really gay, he has an incredibly complicated beard system set up.

  Yes. An actual tiger growing a beard would be interesting.

12:02 PM Tiger Woods not shaving is less of a headline. To me, anyway.

 me: Maybe he should focus on 'shaving' a few strokes off his golf game instead! AM I RIGHT??

12:03 PM Stephanie: LADIES?!