Lord of the Rings: Two Towers Recap

Okay. No one would go with me to see Lord of the Rings and in a crowded, sold out theater, I still had empty seats on both sides of me. Seriously, guys. Do I smell or something? Guys? 

The couple sitting next to me had the wife's purse on the seat between us. They probably did it on purpose so I could pretend I was saving the seat for my date.

Seeing LOTR again just reminds me that I have hobbit-feet hair...on my back.

You think Sam and Frodo had it rough, try drinking a venti iced coffee and not peeing before starting the movie.

Gimli's line at the beginning is a pretty good foreshadowing for the rest of my 4-hour movie-watching abilities: "I'm wasted on cross-country. We dwarves are natural sprinters. Very dangerous over short distances." Also describes my running. 

LOTR Band Names:

• Elvish Presley   
• Gríma McEntire

• Middle Earth, Wind, and  Shire

• 3 Mordors downs

• Elrond Stewart

• Goll 'um Oates 

• The Isleygard Brothers

Totally worth it sitting through the longer extended edition. All sorts of hobbit sex scenes were cut out of the original release.

Speaking of Extended Edition, SPOILER ALERT: All you 'Game of Thrones' fans will be happy to hear there's a new flashback scene that makes Boromir less of a douche for what happened in the first movie. (Ps...Sean Bean's name should totally rhyme but it doesn't.)