Calling it a 'cache' makes it sound classy.

According to this LA Times article, Navy SEALs found a cache of porn--and lots of it--in Bin Laden's hide-out. I bet he was in to some really freaky sh*t (read: hairy). Also, people get offended when I talk about the "mountain of porn" I have in my room. But when I call it a cache, I sound sophisticated and mature. Especially when I say it in italics.

I wonder if that works with other things I have a lot of. "Ladies, would you like to come back to my place? I have...

• ...a cache of marshmallows."
• ...a cache of trampolines."
• ...a cache of beanie babies."
• ...a cache of pizza cartons."
• ...a cache of ironic tshirts."

Mmmm sexy.