The ratio of newspapers to bibles in this Starbucks is alarmingly high.

The number of attractive people in this Starbucks is also quite high today. Normally this would be a good thing if there weren't so much overlap.

There's a bible study group here twice a week and their leader is a young, energetic personality who seems to know every single person in this joint. He knows me now since I made the mistake of reading a book called Creation in public. Now I'm on his hit list when I explained it was about Charles Darwin. He asks me about it every time I see him. But that's not why I don't like him. If you have a soul patch, I think it's pretty obvious why I don't like you. I bet he's in a Christian rock band and plays frolf on Saturdays. 

I'm also pretty sure the age of Christians is always inversely proportionate to the amount of hair product used. It's probably in the bible somewhere. I should ask one of the guys sitting on either side of me if I can borrow theirs so I can look it up.